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Archive for April, 2011

School Board Selects Cardboard Cutout to Succeed Superintendent Weast; <br>James Franco to Film Weast Biopic

School Board Selects Cardboard Cutout to Succeed Superintendent Weast;
James Franco to Film Weast Biopic

“We were all pretty depressed about School Superintendent Jerry Weast’s impending retirement.  I could hardly get out of bed in the morning,” said Board Member Frank Pierce.  “We may be one of the finest school districts in the country, but you don’t get that way without doin

04.27.2011| Education |

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PRESS RELEASE: Treat Your iPad to Dinner-- It’s Restaurant Week!

PRESS RELEASE: Treat Your iPad to Dinner– It’s Restaurant Week!

It’s Restaurant Week in Bethesda! That means 11 out of the 2,375 restaurants in Bethesda are offering Special Menus to appeal to customers.  We would have called it, “A Handful-of-Old-Hat-Restaurants-Feeling-Threatened-By-New-Competition-Would-Like-to-Remind-You-They-Exist-By-Offering-Discount

04.13.2011| Business |

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Recipe for a Smugtini...or something...

Recipe for a Smugtini…or something…

Dear Editors: I'm much too busy and successful to care what's in a smugtini. It's vodka and it's chilled and I want to see what the t-shirt looks like before I accept it. Thankfully we will be having Smut-tinis later which involve my husband submersing his sausage and peppers in ve

04.4.2011| Culture |

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Shops Find that Offering Free Drugs and Alcohol to Customers Improves Sales

Shops Find that Offering Free Drugs and Alcohol to Customers Improves Sales

After learning that a local denim store provides beer to shoppers (Bethesda Gazette, 3/30/11), nearby businesses decided to cash in on the trend.  Equator Fitness now offers pre-workout Ritalin and post-workout Oxycontin to members.  Boring Noble Books provides Xanax for those shopping in the busi

04.4.2011| Business |

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