New Bus Rapid Transit System May Ease Traffic in 2040! Cause for Celebration!
The County Council proposed a new bus rapid transit system that they predict will take more than 80,000 commuters off congested County roadways.
Some on the Council were skeptical. “I don’t get it. What’s in it for developers?” asked Council member Fiona Norris.
“Every bus will be its own self-contained retail/residential complex,” said Charlie Frake. “You can shop on the bus, you can sleep on the bus.”
“That’s more like it,” said Norris.
“There are faster ways to take 80,000 people off the road,” said Gary Rollenbeck, a Silver Spring resident who commutes by bicycle. “Just make them walk across the street at Georgia and Colesville during rush hour.”
The transit system is expected to be fully operational by 2040, when everyone who cares about it will have forgotten, and everyone who paid taxes to support it will be dead.
Fast forward, May 2040: Twenty-eight-year-old Jim Farmington asks, “What are these buses for? And why can’t I take the jet pack to work like everyone else?”
“The biggest barrier I see to moving forward with this bus system is that none of us will be in office to take credit for the project when it’s finished,” said Council member Ron Spoork.
Council members nodded in agreement and tabled the project indefinitely.