PRESS RELEASE: Treat Your iPad to Dinner– It’s Restaurant Week!
It’s Restaurant Week in Bethesda! That means 11 out of the 2,375 restaurants in Bethesda are offering Special Menus to appeal to customers. We would have called it, “A Handful-of-Old-Hat-Restaurants-Feeling-Threatened-By-New-Competition-Would-Like-to-Remind-You-They-Exist-By-Offering-Discounts Week.” However, that’s too long, and we will not say Discount because that sounds depressing. Instead, we will say these menus are Special! And You are Special, too. You deserve a Special Three-Course Lunch or Dinner in one of Bethesda’s Top-ish Restaurants! Some of these places are already popular. Some of the ones that aren’t are lucky to be near the cupcakes, as in, ‘Before we have cupcakes, maybe we should have dinner?’ ‘Nah!’ Well, now you can do both!
We want you to have a Special Experience and still have plenty of jack left to shop on Bethesda Row! In fact, we gently suggest that before you are fit to be seen at a Top-ish Restaurant, you need to buy a few things. Stop in to each one of the gauntlet of boutiques positioned strategically in your path! How about a chic new wrap and a cute pair of shoes to wear to dinner? How about a bracelet? And while you’re at it, you could use some exfoliating cream, and we hate to mention it, but how about a refresh on the highlights? And get a little juiced before your meal—buy a bottle of wine at the fancy wine shop! Just don’t drink it in public, or if you do, put it in a bag, like that guy who hangs out by the parking garage. In fact, you could ask him to share, which is what we call a “tasting!” And last but decidedly not least, before dinner, stop into the Apple store, and purchase an iPad. Your new iPad will be hungry! Take it to dine with you in one of Bethesda’s Top-ish Restaurants! Wondering how much an iPad eats?* Don’t worry! With Restaurant Week’s Special Discount Menus, your iPad will not blow the budget.
*Three-course meals only, and no ordering from the children’s menu. Your iPad doesn’t do mac and cheese.
Restaurant Week extends through April 17. It is brought to you by FancyPants Real Estate, specializing in making you feel better about shopping at strip malls by designing them to look like Faux-Europe!